I have a new toy. I bought it in Las Vegas with Lisa, Kristy and Gabriella, where we wound up at an outlet mall because that’s where everyone seemed to think we should go. The people in Las Vegas are very much about the “outlet mall.” When we were trying to find a place to have breakfast that wasn’t underground – Vegas is like a city of mole people – the woman at the concierge desk sent us to the iHop adding that “it’s near the outlet mall!” like that was a BIG BONUS! And then at least three other people, including the doorman and the cab driver, were all “Oh, you’ll be near the outlet mall!” So, as you can imagine, I was excited about this magical place called the “outlet mall,” because I’ve never been to an “outlet mall” before. Well, we went there – but not before breakfast at the iHop, where I’ve also never been and where the waitress almost had a panic attack when Lisa asked for Earl Gray tea, because she didn’t know what it was. She didn’t know what “black tea” was either, so Lisa finally settled on “Tea tea. Lipton’s tea,” because that’s what the waitress said they had – and it turns out the outlet mall is just a collection of stores with cheap, shitty clothes, so I was pretty disappointed. However, and this is a big however, there was a booth selling flying inflatable remote control sharks. Of course, I had to buy one and I’m going to call him Feargal Sharkey. Lisa just looked at me blankly when I said that. Why do I even hang out with her?
The shark is one of these, this is gonna be fun: