I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: some people have a lot of extra time on their hands. How do they DO IT???

I am so bad at time management. I’m late for everything. I always feel like there aren’t enough hours in a day. I don’t get to exercise or have cool hobbies or take that sommelier course I’ve always wanted to take…or travel…some days I don’t even get to shower.

MEANWHILE, there are people out there poring over Barak Obama speeches to find split second clips so they can put together fake videos of the POTUS singing LMFAO tunes. Or doing this: Recreating Anchorman with their cats.  What? The? Fark? WHO HAS THIS KIND OF TIME??? (The same people who brought us Elf recreated with pugs, apparently.)

I need to go to bed now. I’m exhausted. Happy Caturday in advance.

(via Neatorama)

This blew my fucking mind.

UPDATE! Thanks to my friend Len, I now know that this is actually a Dutch Alzheimer’s PSA. 

“The Dutch Alzheimer Foundation came with a very special version of this gift.

Unwrapping the gift is the same what alzheimer’s patients experience every day. Unwrapping brings them the easter bunny feeling.

The text on the unwrapped gift: Alzheimer’s patients have to deal with this feeling daily.”

(via Bits and Pieces)

This condom commercial was banned in Australia, apparently, which is kind of surprising, since anyone who has ever been skiing or snowboarding knows that the entire country of Australia is super slutty.

Weren’t they all descended from criminals and hookers? Or am I lazily perpetuating a rumour by typing that? Meh. Whatever.

The ad is cute.

(Via Shock Mansion)

This is a mouse decorating a Christmas tree.

It makes me feel kind of sad about the dead one our cats left us on the bed the other day, which I didn’t give much thought to until now.

Anyhoo. Look! It’s a mouse decorating a Christmas tree!

(Via Tastefully Offensive)

If you’re wondering what to get me for Christmas, I’d really like one of these NYC Taxi Drivers 2014 Beefcake Calendars.

The pics are shot by Philip Kirkman and Shannon McLaughlin and the proceeds go to University Settlement, “America’s oldest settlement house (1886), based on New York City’s Lower East Side and serving over 30,000 immigrant and working individuals and families every year with basic services like quality education, housing, and literacy programs.”

They’re currently on backorder but you can get your order in now. For you, of course. Or me.

(via Laughing Squid)

It’s Friday. So, let’s watch Benedict Cumberbatch reading R. Kelly lyrics on Jimmy Kimmel.

“Bodies so freaking soft. I can’t wait to turn you on….You got me like, la la la la la, baby. Is how you make me feel, baby. I can feel your body flowers, while I’m kissing on your thighs…”

I just happened to have the “Otters who look like Benedict Cumberbatch” pic lying around, so figured I might as well use it.

Anyhoo. Enjoy.

And here is a dog doing laundry.

Some genius went and invented a washing machine, called “Woof to Wash,” for assistance dogs to do laundry. It’s bark activated and should make your day.

My only question is, aren’t dogs colour blind? And, if so, wouldn’t they have trouble with sorting?

And, oh look! Because this is the internet, I can find out the answer to that question right away. And the answer is that dogs do see colours, just not as richly as we do. OK, then. Carry on…

(Via Incredible Things)

I have mixed feelings about Movember.

First of all, it’s kind of pink ribbony. Dudes growing moustaches doesn’t necessarily translate into more money for cancer research. Second: I understand there’s a bit of a question over the veracity with which the medical community is now pursuing prostate cancer, and that it’s possible that aggressive treatments might kill you faster than the cancer itself, which is often slow growing.

That being said, I do love a man in a moustache.

Regardless, I just wanted to get that out there and it doesn’t actually matter what I think because (it must have been love but) it’s over now. And it’s time for Decembeaver. YAY! Get ready ladies to chuck those razors and kiss your waxer goodbye until the new year!

I’m a little late to this party but whatever. I have a baby.

This is not a real product but this video is still pretty funny. Enjoy, if you haven’t seen it yet either.

This is almost the most fun I’ve had all day. It would be the most fun I’ve had all day but I went to the park and put a six month old on the swings, then I had delicious tacos at this place called La Carnita, which seems like a bit of a hipster douche hangout but we were there early so it was pretty empty and the food was awesome.

Anyhoodle, this was still pretty fun. Take this quiz! Is it an Ikea item or a death metal band? I scored 10 out of 20. Can you do better?

http://ikeaordeath.com/