HOLY CRAP WOULD YOU EVER? I MEAN NO JUST HELL NO

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UG3300

Oh, look, it’s the world’s longest glass-bottomed walkway. It span 984 feet and is a cool 590 feet above the ground. No biggie. The walkway replaced an old wooden bridge, apparently, and is located in Shiniuzhai Geopark in Hunan. The floor is made of double-layered glass that is less than an inch thick but is supposedly 25 times stronger than regular window glass.

The bridge links the two peaks of Stone Buddha Mountain. Eleven engineers working 12 hours a day converted it from wood to glass. It’s being called “hero bridge.”

I say heroes are every day people who do brave things like save dogs from burning buildings and railroad people out of perilous situations. While you might be brave to cross this bridge, there’s nothing heroic about it unless there’s, like, a kitten that needs rescuing on the other side. SO THERE. SCREW YOU AND YOUR BRIDGE.

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(Via Bored Panda/Shanghaist)


Hands down the stupidest idea in the history of stupid ideas

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The NYPD is warning people not to buy this gun shaped iPhone case, and Amazon has reportedly stopped selling them.

Also, New York’s Oceans County Prosecutor’s Office posted this message on its Facebook page: “Please folks – this cell phone case is not a cool product or a good idea. A police officer’s job is hard enough, without having to make a split second decision in the dark of night when someone decides without thinking to pull this out while stopped for a motor vehicle violation.”

I say leave it alone and let’s just see how things play out. What’s the worst that could happen?

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(via Metro/ Image via Twitter)


Two girls try to make each other swallow a cockroach, because Japan

I don’t know what the prize is for the winner of this Japanese game show but I can’t think of anything that would induce me to participate.

 


Is H&M creating and “honoring” neo-Nazi metal bands?

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Did H&M create fake neo-Nazi metal bands in order to “honor” them and sell clothes?

Metal Injection is investigating the weirdness.

A marketing campaign by some entity calling itself Strong Scene Productions claimed to be designed to sell a new “metal” line by the Swedish retailer.

The campaign purported to be highlighting forgotten underground metal bands of yore. The weird thing? None of them actually appeared to exist before a couple of weeks ago.

“As illustrated by the bomber jacket and t-shirts worn by the models of H & M, the new items feature logos from long-forgotten underground goth- and thrash acts such as the French LANY, Mexican MORTUS, American “cosmic hippie metal” -gurus MYSTIC TRIANGLE and GREY from Germany – the originator of the whole symphonic female metal-genre.

“Here’s the problem, none of these bands have any sort of history beyond pages created this year. For example, Strong Scene claims to be founded in 1999, yet they only recently launched a Facebook page. They have an amazing Geocities-like “official” website listing all their bands, none of which have info on them available anywhere.”

A Reddit member claiming to remember one of the bands from high school had only been a Reddit member for a few hours.

Strong Scene posted a video to YouTube featuring these supposed “legendary” underground groups.

And some guy on Twitter who’s a metal something or other claims these bands are all his favourites, though the tweets have been removed since Metal Injection posted them. See them there. 

Anyway:

“But here is the absolute worst part, if this is all a giant marketing stunt. Two of the bands seem to have ties to the NSBM scene (that’s National Socalist Black Metal aka racists/neo-nazis). For example, the bio of the band “The One” lists them as being a part of the official band page of the record label “National Heritage Pride.” The band LA/NY have imagery of Hitler on their band profile.”

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The image has since been removed from wherever it came from. But still. What the what?

There’s more. Read it here.

H&M reportedly says they know nothing about any of this, and after the story broke, it seems that Strong Scene distanced themselves from H&M and claimed the whole thing was some kind of joke, and that they are actually “a one- time improvised, collective art project in the vein of Spinal Tap, Monty Python and the Yes Men with no intentions on anything except for art.”

Er, yes. Just like Spinal Tap. But with Hitler. Makes sense. Either that or a super idiotic campaign gone horribly wrong.

Either way, I vote this one a big fail. Your art, I like it not, Strong Scene.


A group of kids skipped school AND YOU WON’T BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED NEXT OMG WTF?

I’ll leave it to you to figure out what this is an ad for.

 


Glitter pills would make you poop glitter but don’t take them because that would be stupid

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Speaking of butts, someone is selling Glitter Pills on Etsy. They’re supposed to make you poop glitter, apparently, but they’re not supposed to make you poop glitter because you’re not supposed to take them. You’re just supposed to look a them and think “Haha. Those pills would make me poop glitter but swallowing glitter would be dangerous, so I’ll just look at them.” Some people probably take them anyway. But you shouldn’t. Don’t take the glitter pills.

From the site: “this item is not meant for consuption, and is only intened for decorative purposes and are not edible, store is not responsible for any misuse of product.” (Typos theirs)

Another way to poop glitter is to becomes a burlesque performer. All the burlesque ladies wind up pooping glitter after performances. It’s a hazard of the trade.


Spider photobombs selfie like a BOSS

LOL. This is harvested from a gif, I think.

Those poor girls. That poor spider. Ain’t nobody happy. Except me. This is comedy gold.

Keep going for the gif (not sure which is the chicken and which is the egg, though)

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Dude dresses a dog as a giant spider and scares the bejesus out of people

I actually hate this trend of pranking people. What if you scare a pregnant woman half to death and she has a miscarriage or something? Assholes.

THAT BEING SAID, this is really, really funny.


This is a very weird video

Sooooo, this was posted in 2006, but Pee Wee Herman just posted it now on Twitter, which brought it to the attention of Laughing Squid, which brought it to to mine.

Here is a super weird woman exercising with poodles. And, apparently, this is a word-for-word parody of Susan Powter’s first workout video. ( Susan Powter is also very strange. And loud.)

The video was part of a series of 10 films made for the 2004 Athens Olympics, by Nagi Noda.


Zoo offers massages from giant Burmese pythons

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The Cebu CIty Zoo in the Philippines is now offering snake massages by four Burmese pythons as part of its move toward becoming more “interactive.”

“Except for the snake trying to constrict my neck it’s actually quite comfortable,” says the dude getting a massage.

A ringing endorsement!

The snakes weigh a combines 250kg, and each is fed a chicken dinner before the treatment.

This looks like it will eventually end badly.